Tear Down Your Wall!

For many years, I tried to use humor to win friends, attract women, and make money.

However, one day, when I hit rock bottom, I realized I had no friends, no women, and no money.

A light bulb went on. I realized that my humor was a wall. A wall that kept people and real feelings out. Heartbreak? Blocked. Disappointment? Shielded. But I also blocked the arrows of love, joy, and happiness. All kept out, I realized, to avoid life's roller coaster of emotions. But what I realized was that while the ups and downs were less high and less low, my roller coaster was now a straight line. It was a spiritual lithium, in addition to the chemical lithium I was prescribed.

But I've torn down the wall, which I call The Great Wall of Funny. And you know what? I have experienced highs and lows I never have before! Sometimes I will have a spontaneous cleansing sobbing jag at work! Sometimes I will just streak along a major thoroughfare for no reason! (My date on the night in question still has to tear down her Great Wall of Embarrassment and Indignation)

I hear voices I never heard before! Beautiful, joyful, crying, angry voices! I call them the Mongol Hordes of Feelings. They tell me to cry when I'm sad and hit when I'm angry, but never laugh, or the Wall goes right back up again.

I realized nothing is funny. Comedy is someone else's misfortune and pain and just thinking about Dude Where's My Car makes me want to cry. Laughter is just plain wrong.

Tear down your Great Wall and let those Hordes in! Let them pillage and wreak havoc on your psyche! Oh, the places you'll black out and go!